" Hijab and The Hypocricy "


Last night I have a great conversation with a friend, about her intention to wear Hijab. Still an idea, as she's still considering the pros and cons to her career and the way of life. She asked my advices, but I let her thinking and take her own decision without me interfering.

But the discussion itself was quite surprised to me, as I never expected she really thought about it. Once we discussed about hijab thing a year ago. Only a small talk, that she's planning to wear hijab after she got married and has a kid. That time would be the perfect time, when there'd be less ambition to want anything in the world (like before) except for the family. We'd have had a settled career (though only as a Mom), perfect family, and planned future. So, nothing wild except to be wiser. Still passionate, but when it comes to family, it would take more consideration.

Wearing hijab in the world called Indonesia, specifically in a big country like Jakarta, it's like a knife that cuts both ways, so damned hard. Paradoxial happens, not to mention about this hijab thing. Though it's famous as a Muslim country, 90% is Muslim, but only a few practice as a REAL Muslim, and only a few KNOW or CARE what ISLAM is really about. The way of thinking, behaviour, and attitudes, so far away to be called as ISLAMIC. I call it HYPOCRITE.

Being a Muslim in Indonesia, it's just like you descended your race, your skin color, your nationality, that 'accidently' packed together when you're born. Very few people try to find out, WHY it happens, HOW it happens, WHAT's the reasons. We take it as it is. So, we NEVER learn because we're TOO lazy to learn. We do as what public do in common, even we know it's wrong. The absolute justification is what the public believe.

Someone has written that we're just praying and devote ourselves merely to the religion, the system, the label, not to the Essence, the Creator of the religion itself, which is GOD. We're still cheating, mean to people, do sexual harassment, superstitious, devote life to other thing except God, while in the other side we declaring ourselves AS Muslim.

I really DON'T mind to anyone that has their own believe. Though I may not agree, I don't have any rights to forbid anyone or give judgment. Like others, I want to be respected, so I give respect. It's just the hypocricy that's really annoying me.

If you accept something, then do it RIGHTLY, TOTALLY. If you know a little, so don't say you're an expert. If you do something that religion says as 'bad', then except it, don't hiding under the masks and pretend that you're innocent. If you feel you do the same thing, then shut your mouth up and don't judging other people as the worse. Hell, I really fed up with all those Indonesian hypocrite!

If you feel you're not ready to wear hijab yet, then DON'T do it. Preparing yourself first, otherwise you'll just make bad impression, not to yourself but to the Islam itself. And honestly, wearing hijab only effect a little bit. I still have some sexual harassment, though now only did by their dirty talk or look, but I still can't handle it, as not just it happens along with the public judgement about women (remember that we live in patriarchal mind), but also because those women have made it worse!

Here, anything could turn to something 'new' that would fit to their own interest. Wearing hijab only when there is some religious occation. Suddenly all covered with an angel face and talk religiously. But when it's over, then the hijab is taken off, turn to sexy dress like before. Wearing hijab just to get public aknowledgement, but behind that still doing forbidden thing. Cover up the head but show off other body. Then what's the point? What's the difference between the one with hijab and the one without?

I know, I should not interfere to anyone's life. I don't mean to be that way and also say that any woman who doesn't wear hijab is bad. NO, just I want to make THIS clear. First, I want to put women and their roles in society, and how public see them generally. Second, the thought of hijab itself.

I've been mingle most of my life with guys, involve with their stories, conversation, and thought. So I'm pretty understood the way they think or what kind of women they're interested at. Most of the time, they only make women as a sexual object, guessing each other whether she's great in bed or not by analyzing her body. EVERYTHING is turn into sex. They don't show their respect anymore, as it happens to ANY WOMAN, even if she wears hijab. ANYTHING I heard is about cheating over partners, sexual habits, or prostitution (legally or not). And if I complain because they're become too much about this thing, they don't like it and turn the subject towards me. So how am I suppose to do? Leave it? I find it everywhere!

I've got some sexual harassment (physical) before I wear hijab, though I never wear sexy dress that will show my body. Let say, like in a bus when it was full packed of people and I didn't get a seat, or when I was a student at the University, did by my lecturer, when he intentionally touched his thing against my elbow, in the middle of examination. I couldn't ask for help, as he is educated, fatherly, religious, and in the top level at my Uni. Thanks God, it was final exam that I don't have to see him ever.

Considering to this facts, that sexual harassment is 'legally' considered as a right and common behavior, and there's no law that protect women from sexual harassment (even in rape cases, the punishment doesn't worth it comparing to what women have to deal with their future!), so it's really bugging me. I'm sick and tired to see hypocrisy everywhere here.

Living in this kind of world that use woman as an object, one of the purpose of wearing hijab is considered to minimize those intention. That it'd raise respect from others, especially from men. Maybe sounds unfair to generalize men as lack of respectfulness. But face the truth, most of men treat women as sex oriented.

The second thought of this matter; Like belief, decision to wear hijab is something that can't be pushed, though in Islam it's a must to every Muslim women. Despite, though anyone's FREE to choose to any option they want in life (by using their brain and knowledge), still, to any RIGHT decision, there's God's willing involved.

So, hijab is NOT just a cloth or the way of Muslim women is dressing. It's more beyond that. It's not just for covering your head, but also covering your heart, mind, and attitudes. It represents of WHAT, HOW, WHY, about the religion and God, The Creator. There's big responsibility over your shoulder to represent it RIGHTLY and PROPERLY. It reflects the whole thing. So, if it did wrongly and uncomplitely, the impression will reach beyond the hijab itself.

Hijab to Muslim women is like the second protection after shalat (5 times main praying) to find our path in life. If shalat can't make us reconsider to some decision we have to make, so hijab gives the extent of justification to be more careful. Because hijab, not like praying, is something that EASILY seen and subjectively judged by public opinion. You wear hijab, meaning you're a Muslim. If you do bad thing, meaning the bad impression will not only stamped to you, but to the religion itself. So, it's a hard task, however it's not difficult.

I hope you've got my point.